Goodness gracious, Borealis, that's an awesome exposition!
I agree that nobody should be blamed for their homophobic feelings, Lancecowboy! How we deal with our feelings, how we chose to express them, that's where our individual responsibility lays. However, nobody is perfect. Ennis is not perfect. That's one of the qualities that makes the distinction between BBM and the average love story. Our Ennis and Jack are real human beings with their good and bad points. Always this bitter taste to the sweetness. Not to mention the quality of its ambiguity (I hope this is the right expression in English!) Without it we would not have had these interesting discussions and exchange of personal impressions of the drama.
The bittersweet taste of Brokeback Mountain. Perfect, like dark dark chocolate. Yes, the ambiguity throughout the entire movie, and even in the characters themselves, makes it more realistic. The imperfection in the characters gives a depth to them that bring them to life. That's why we love them so.
Not that it matters much, but I believe Cassie said: "Ennis, girls don't fall in love WITH fun." She responded to his "Sorry. I was probably no fun anyway, was I?" Until I read your words, Lancecowboy, I never thought that Cassi's words made Ennis realise his love for Jack, but I see your point. You "get you point across."
You are probably right. It's been a while since I watched the movie, so the word may indeed be "with" and not "for" however, in this case, the English language is flexible enough to allow either word to convey more or less the same meaning, although the word "fun" would be changed from an active word on Cassie (girl) part to an attribute describing the love object (Ennis). This makes his response more understandable and appropriate.
I think Ennis' self denial over a long time would have made him regard himself as unworthy of love. Cassie's words also might help him accept that he was a worthy love object in his own right. But Cassie's words didn't change him. It didn't open his eyes. Not in my view. I think he was too stubborn for that, and I think he was glad to get rid of her. After all she was his cover up. He sent the postcard to Jack, yes, but that was just to go on with the routine: two or three annual mountain trips. I think he stuck to his own words: "Jack, if you can't fix it, you have to stand it. ... For as long as we can ride."
I don't think Ennis admitted himself his own deep feelings towards Jack before he got the postcard in return after Jack was dead, and he never really accepted Jack's expressions of love before Lureen told him about Jack's wish for his ashes to be spread at BBM. (flood of tears, just a moment..)
This is brilliant! I am sure you are right about Ennis feeling unworthy, and feeling stuck in his old ways, not ready to change, until the postcard marked "Deceased." We don't know what we miss until it's gone. I think you may be right about the timing. Part of Heath's genius in the telephone booth, as Jackster pointed out elsewhere, was his facial portrayal of a man tortured and in pain, not only for the lost of Jack, but also in search of the meaning for his pain...and the realization of it, as Lureen spoke of Jack's fond memory of Brokeback Mountain...that summer when he was tending sheep. That resonated with his own memories. It made sense of everything between him and Jack, that this moment of revelation galvanized his motivation to take Jack's ashes up the mountain, "I swear."
It is possible that I misunderstand your words since English is not my mother's tongue, but I disagree with you that Ennis finally was able to let go of the love that he lost after he found the two shirts. That's not happening. On the contrary, he brings the brings the memory of love home. I think this is the crucial point when he really is able to see the true nature of his and Jack's relationship; love. It's too late, of course, but he does never let go of this love. I don't think so. In a way they are both dead. That's the beauty and the tragedy. It's a classic - Romeo and Juliet - Tristan and Isolde - Ennis and Jack.
No you did not misunderstand me, but I did not express myself clearly. I don't mean Ennis let go of the love, but that he let go of the grief for the love that he did not know he had. In a way, it was the vague undefined nature of the love he felt for Jack, which tortured him most. It was nebulous and fuzzy, and Ennis was not the sharpest tool in the shed at the best of times. So it was confusing. He tried running from it, tried holding back from it, tried ignoring it. And when he lost it, he wanted to have it, and could not and did not understand this deep pain in his whole being. But when he finally "got" it, it made sense of everything, and he held this lost love in memory, but let go of it in his struggle to catch it. "When you got nothing, you need nothing." Ennis was used to being denied, and in his self-denial, the lost of Jack was his penance for all 'em years of denying Jack. So he understood Jack's love in a flash, and accepted its lost as he reached out in the closet to touch the blood stained sleeves. The love was made real. As you said, he took it home with him in a paper bag, put it in a closet, and carried on with his life. He still had dreams of it, and he welcomed it, but he was no longer held in its spell.
It's kind of difficult to explain, but in a way, it is like PBS. Until I had this forum to sort out all the intricate subtle nuances of the movie, I as held in its grip and searched and wanted to know more. Then two three years of therapy in this valley of peace and friendship, where none was expected, helped me to put it in a safe and treasured space. I still love and enjoy it, as Ennis would the two shirts, but am no longer held hostage, captive by it. I can let it go, because I know I own it, in a place sacred and private, shared with no one, unless I want to share it. Just as Ennis was happy to share his love for Jack with Jack's Ma, and even a glimpse of it with Alma Junior, he was neither afraid of showing it, nor needing to showing it off. It simple was. Ennis was unclenched, smiling, and happy.
I appreciate the reference to the mistress of silence. Sometimes, no words speak louder and more volumes than long speeches.