It can be argued that Ennis is the more reticent of the lovers, whereas Jack is the more emotive. Nonetheless, one can say that Ennis's love is deeper, more enduring, and ever faithful.
For Ennis, the embodiment is the final oath he takes to stay true to Jack -- even unto death.
For Jack, it is the memory of the cherished, sexless, and unifying embrace.
Personally, I tend to (or want to) identify my ideal of love with that of Ennis. But I must admit that it is Jack's vulnerable openness and acceptance that overwhelmingly captures my heart.
Which of the two is closer to your idealization of love? Which of the two captures your heart?